But this shit right HERE!?!?
SMH x 1 TRILLION.
This is ignorant on a whole new level. Despite ALL the great emcees out on this planet, somebody had the AUDACITY to put “Hip-Hop’s Savior” over a tape featuring the Grand Poobah of Unicorn Tears, the WNBA of Sports, the Syrup-Bleeding Sultan, the Ambassador of Estrogen, Mr. Fancy Feast Femcee, the First Lady of Young Money, the Human Vegetarian Wrap, the Queen of Canada, the Teenybopper of Toronto, Lil’ Wayne’s personal Fonzworth Bentley: Drake.
You really mean to tell me this is the “Savior” of Hip-Hop?
Now I’m gonna be fair, none of the above pictures is the reason why Drake is wack, they’re just too great to not include.
This is the second time in my life I’ve given a Drake album/mixtape an entire spin, and every time it’s like whiney Canadian nails on a chalkboard. But listen, these first two tracks were as forgettable as the fact that you all forgot when Drake fell on stage and got carried off like he was Paul Pierce in the 2008 NBA Finals.
I really can’t believe he dropped this line though in the third track, “Zone”:
“If I’m in your starting 5, you will never need a sub/ And I’m never lookin’ down so I always know what’s uuuuuuuuup”
Drake, I’ll give you that one. You are the sum of 5 entire submissive men, and you really don’t need another at that point. The next line:
“A picture won’t do me justice, league in this bitch, Imma do me, trust this”
Nah, that pretty much sums you up right there, playboy.
I’d say it’s right about here, that’s right, track 3, that he starts getting emotional on this tape:
“Okay, okay, I’m grown, I’m grown/ Party at my house, but I’m home, alone”
Realize too that this lyric is part of the HOOK. S. M. H.
This is also the beginning of the next 274 times you’re going to hear him use the phrase, “my ex-girl”.
Track 5 “Love & Gunz” is 0:50 long, but he drops a gem that I couldn’t ignore:
“Damn, another 20 missed calls/ I love her and I hate her, it’s a funny twist y’all/ Can’t stand it when she in town, but miss her when she gone/ Truth be told, I’d rather be with her than alone”
Y’all gonna really sit there and tell me that this couldn’t be the poetry written by a 16-year-old highschooler on her period? How many of you have had a girlfriend that destroyed you on the phone just to call back and hour later because she’s “emotional” and “doesn’t know what she wants”? Drake really writes lines like he’s the diplomat of all crazy broads out there. Come to think of it, every crazy broad I know loves Drake. This isn’t an accident. He’s plagiarizing his whole career out of depressed girl’s diary.
Track 6, “Bedrock Pt. 2 (Ft. Lil’ Wayne & Lloyd)” really tested my patience:
“Oooh, baby, I be stuck to you like glue, baby”
I know we’ve all heard this line before, but really Lloyd be stealin’ his lines from kids that still play on the jungle gym with these preschool rhymes. Have an entire seat.
Up next made me mad before I even heard it. This track is called “Scriptures”. See, this is what pisses me off. He thinks he’s so dope that his lyrics are of religious proportions. Problem is though, he’s got stans that think the same thing, and I hate a Drake stan more than Drake himself, let me explain…
Every rapper has the right to make music, good or bad. I mean, in all honesty, we need the Gucci Mane’s, the Waka Flocka’s, and the Soulja Boy’s to point to in order to show people how NOT to do it, and they’re gonna have their fans, if the didn’t, we wouldn’t know who they were. But stans are a whole new breed of ignorant. They live their whole life as if the word of these wack rappers is bond. They quote lyrics from these rappers and evolve how they live around it. They drank all the Kool-Aid, and when you suggest them a different drink that might be a little more healthy for them, they tell you that Kool-Aid has all the nutrients of orange juice, milk, a protein shake, and a balanced daily diet, all blended together. These rappers sell their soul to make it mainstream and make money, so you see where it comes from, not saying it’s right, but you can see. Stans don’t make single penny, but even worse, they SUPPORT it. They’re on the whole wrong end of the equation.
Okay, back to this abortion of a mixtape.
Track 8, “Where Were You (Ft. Colin Munroe)” is just him going on about his “ex-girl” again.
When will Drake learn that we all know this happens. When people blow up, the ex’s always come back. This ain’t rocket science. Was he really inspired so deeply with this foreign idea of his ex’s hitting him up now that he’s big? These Canadians…
Finally, on track 10, “Believe It Or Not” he gets a feature with somebody on his lyrical level. Insert Gucci Mane. He even made a shout-out to ME:
“Young Money forever, I bet Gutta, Jae and Mac agree/ Fuck you to the haters that just spend their time attackin’ me”
Drake hears the criticism. I know for a fact he hears it. So he ain’t got a problem dropping a generic “fuck you”, but when a seasoned veteran like Common, who’s been in this game for 20 years calls him out by name, he disappears faster than Kleenax’s when Kanye is going through his scrapbook of him and Amber Rose. But Drake stayed true to form and kept it 100 by stayin’ Charmin soft and keeping his mouth shut.
A lot of these tracks I straight skipped because they were 30 second snippets and ain’t even gonna justify those.
Now if you’re a Drake aficionado, you’re probably saying, “All these songs are old af!”
But more importantly, if you’re a Drake aficionado you shoulda off’d yourself minutes, hours, days, weeks, months, perhaps even years ago, so the fact that you’re even reading this right now is a fluke, an error, a flaw, a mistake, if you will.
Now when I say Drake has been killing the game his whole career, I mean it quite literally, he’s been making the genre of Hip-Hop die, his WHOLE career. Just look at who fathered this clown:
Can you even imagine what kind of rapper Drake would nurture into the game? He’d be the first one to announce he was signing a 3-legged kitten he found at the animal shelter after watching one of those abused puppy dog commercials.
Anyway, I’m done with this tape. Whoever put the word “Savior” over a Drake tape should reconsider his life and take long look into his mascara-laced eyes and find a person that deserves to walk around in society with the rest of us.